I’m here, I’m good, I love it, I do miss home alot!

Bula all of those readers of my blog (maybe like 5 of you haha), I have arrived in Fiji and things are good. It has been a good 1 week and 1/2 so far. I am settling and getting adjusted to the culture and lifestyle which is pretty unlike my own in the States. God is opening up doors and creating awesome opportunities to do some great ministries…. literacy program, discipling 1 or 2 girls in the youth group, co-leader of one of the awanas groups every saturday, visiting with locals, and just having a good time loving people with Jesus’ love. I will write more and post pics when I get a few more than 2 so for now please pray pray pray…. I miss home alot and it’s harder than I expected it would be to be away for 2 months. Much love, talk to you soon.

I leave sooo soon…. I’m stoked!

Each day I keep rememberin that I’m moving out of the country…it’s so strange. It hasn’t set in really at all. I’m off to Fiji 9 days and in 11 1/2 days, I will be at my new, “temporary” home. I cannot wait for the amazing things I know God is going to do through me and reveal to me, whoot whoot!! I’m trying to eat my favorite foods when I can before I go since I will be definitely dining quite differently once I’m there. The menu will be mostly the complete opposite of what I eat here, but that’s ok, I’ll adjust fine I’m sure. I am also trying to soak up as much A/C and ice as I can. This may seem funny to some of you but in a place like Fiji, A/C and ice cubes are two fairly expensive items and are therefore commonplace among most people. (Unless of course you go to a place of business in the larger cities or to the resorts) Ok so how cool is it going to be to be able to spend time with the locals, lovin on them and making friends…. SO COOL! haha okie dokie, well that’s it for today. talk to you soon.

Here is a pic of some of the awesome youth that I’ll be hangin out with while in Fiji, I love it, I love it, I love it!!! Can’t wait to see them. Yay!

Picture loading question…..

Ok so I just tried to load some pics onto my previous blog and it didn’t work…. How do you do it? I’m so bad at this stuff….somebody help me.

It’s been too long….I know!!

Ok so I finally decided to take a glance at my Blog (after Kim reminded that I need to keep up on it while I am away- more on that later) So I check- YIKES!! It has been 6 months since my last post, where the heck have I been? And then a Rachel also mentioned at small group that I need to stay updating my blog. Yes, I know I’ve been lame at this and I promise to try to be better at it. Funny too because I love to write out my feelings and thoughts and all that but and I meant to make this blogging thing a habit but it just never happened. But I am going to try now.
Well let me tell you that it has been a roller coaster for sure. But a fun one in some ways and lots of moments of where I thought I’d never make it through but I guess that’s what life is all about. I made my missions trip to India. Wow what an amazing journey that was, and I will never be the same because of it. Thanks Sandals, Kim, and my wonderful team for allowing me to come along. What a blessing it was! God really spoke to me and did a great work in my heart and I came back and I asked myself, “Could I go to another country and do what missionaries are doing? Could I give a part of my life to serving God somewhere than the only home I have ever known?” It was a big question for me, for as some of you know- I am normally NOT the daring, adventurous person who would ask a question that kind of question for fear of getting an answer, or an answer that I didn’t want to hear. But this wasn’t the normal me anymore, for over this past year and through my trip to India, God has begun to transform my heart and shape me into the woman He wants me to be, not the one I want to be or think that I should be or think I have the capability to be….Because God knows and wants so much more than anything that I could imagine or hope for myself- What excitement came over me when I realized how truly and clearly this reality has started to become to me. WOW- I’m a part of this plan, I matter, He wants to use me, little old, shy Lindsey. I can’t believe it! But totally awesome! Well, suddenly I felt this urging from God to go somewhere else- but “Where is that?” I asked. I don’t know what I’m doing or talking about, I am not an expert on this kind of thing by any means. But hey, I guess I’ll just pray about it and maybe I’ll get my answer. I was about to graduate, start my credential and really get somewhere in life right? Yeah sure, I suppose, who knows. Haha Well, not even a day after I arrived back from India, still feeling this same feeling, my mom took me by her pastor’s house to say hi and tell him about my trip. Well, sometimes God works to answer prayer faster than He does others….for specific reasons of course. If we all got everything we prayed for at the same time, then it just wouldn’t work. Well, her pastor hears about my trip and then just suddenly tells me that I should go to Fiji on the missions trip that his church was taking. I sorta laughed and thought he was joking. Nope, not a chance. He was totally serious and said I was supposed to go. So I tell him I’ll pray about it, sure what could it hurt. I mean that’s what I thought when I considered applying tp go to India.
Well it took me about 4 days to realize that this was what I was already praying for, God had answered my prayer….it just took me a little bit to get it. So I graduate, finish up two classes and hurry off to Fiji. What an amazing trip, not better than India….just different. God used me in ways that He didn’t use me in India. How cool is it when God shows us that we are not limited. We think we are but the truth is that when we do that, we, in some ways, are putting limits on God and the power and strength He has created us to have. God placed me in a leadership role that I have never really known and I was “forced” to solely depend on God and not others to be successful in different situations for the glory of His kingdom. I got to do and share things about my life with others who needed to hear it, and God knew that.
Anyways, so here I go rambling on and on. What’s my point right? Well I returned from Fiji and realized that Fiji is the place I am supposed to go. So through prayer and communication with the missionaries that we worked with in Fiji, I feel God is calling me to go back. WHOOT WHOOT! I got the green light in every way possible (or at least the important ways) and I’m so very excited, nervous, at peace and stoked to be able to go serve the Lord. Ahh I am feeling so much, I don’t even know all of what I’m feeling but I know it’s going to be good. Even though it’s only for 3 months, tt is going to be crazy living in another country, but I know that I wouldn’t be at the place that I am today, listening to God’s voice telling me to do this, if it hadn’t been for my awesome family, a ton of people praying for me, an awesome church and a great small group encourgaing me in the Lord.
Who knows what God wants to teach me through this journey I am about to take in two weeks but I am happy to say that I think I am finally ready to honestly say that no matter what God asks of me, I will do. Because without Him, I am nothing and I am who I am because of His love!
Oh yeah, so be keeping me in prayer these next 3 months. I’m going to need lots of it! I’ll miss all my small group friends and fellow Sandalites, but I shall return.
Ok then, I’m off to bed now. I’ll write more soon, before I leave. Keep up the reading (those of you who actually read my blogging or lack of blogging I should say) as I will be updating my blog while I’m in Fiji…..

Below is a sweet pic of my soon-to-be front yard….ahhh!! Enjoy!

It’s been awhile and a lot has changed…ok well not really :)

Ok so here I am trying to be responsible, gettin ahead on homework assignments so that when end of March and April comes around, I’m not tearing my hair out- which seems to be happening quite easily lately- as the India trip approaches.  My mom stresses me out, I love the mom, she is one my best friends, but when she worries and stresses, i worry about her worrying too much.  how does that make any sense?  I should be the sane, calm one right (ok and in comparison, i am during these times but still) I’m doing alot better about not worrying and stressing so much about things that i cannot do anything about or haven’t happened yet.  I need to find a quiet, peaceful place to go and just pray and read my bible during such times.  Sometimes I just gotta get out of my apartment, I just need some quiet sometimes and the tension can be pretty thick at times- thats all i’m gonna say.  Anyways, school is killing me, I’m really not into to much of anything else besides church and India. But i’m trying to have a good attitude about it anyways.  My last semester (besides a couple classes in the summer) and I am graduating in May!!!! I am so excited.  I was going to go on to apply to nursing schools but after praying and really seeking God, I feel like He wants me to go back to becoming a teacher.  Ahhh what a ride.  Last week was a crazy week for me, very emotional.  I guess this is what they call becoming an adult and making decisions for myself, obviously seeking God’s will in it all.  I’m naturally a people pleaser and i’m trying to learn to do things for myself rather than always worry about others, and it’s difficult to do I must say. But i’ve seen quite a bit of growth i think, it’s all about the molding and shaping He is doing each day.   I’m just so focused on going to India, i can’t think of anything else practically! I’m the type of person who starts packing for a trip a week before I’m going to leave, yeah i’m weird.  I like to know that i have all my ducks in a row and I’ve got all I need.  Yeah we still have alittle under 2mo. until we leave and I’m freakin out about what clothes i’m going to wear, what I need to bring, etc.  I’ve got to get goin on that.  Ok well not really freaking out but I’m slighty stressin about it, thinkin in the back of my mind how i need to get started on these things before it’s too late and I’m down to the end.  *Breathe, breathe*   The Botswana team leaves in about 3 weeks!! I’m really excited for them, keep them in your prayers.  They still have alot to prepare for in such a little amount of time.  I’m gonna have to research on jetlag remedies for when I come back from India.  Because we get back Sunday evening and then I’ve got class the next day that I CAN’T miss since there will only be 2 weeks left in the semester.  It will be a little crazy but thats ok.  It’ll be all worth it for this trip.  I couldn’t think of anything better that I could be doing with my time.  Jesus is so faithful and amazing to give us just what we need and He is showing me this more and more everyday.  There are reasons for everything and He puts things and people in our lives for a purpose that is so far beyond anything that we can comprehend.  I love how awesome He is in showing us His glory.  God is good, all the time!  Alright, back to homework.   

Ok so check out the Sandals Worldwide India Team blog page for continuous updates before, during and after the trip.  It’ll be good stuff.  http://weybright.typepad.com/teamindia/     Keep us in your prayers, we need all the support throughout this whole next few months.      

Check out a short video of our recent trip to Artesia/Little India, narrated by one of my awesome team members, John Perez. 

Download littleindia.mov

I’m ready for it to be April!

Ok so these next 2 weeks better not drag out.  I’m ready for it to be the end of the semester and it to be next semester….ok I take that back, I wish it was April.  Why you ask- well because I am going to India with Sandals Worldwide!!!! Yes I am!  I am so excited and blessed that God would have me go tell others in another country about His amazing love for His people.  It still has not set in completely that I get to do something so awesome and I can already tell that God is going to do some amazing things in our teams, and through our teams, in the hearts of those that we come in contact. We had our first meeting tonight and it was so great.  I think both the India and Botswana team are going to be awesome.  I have to hurry and get on gettin my passport and about 6 or something different shots, but thats ok I don’t mind it, it’s just the part about having to go do it.  But, I don’t really want to get Malaria or typhoid so I think that I’ll make the time to go get them.  Anyways, lots to do.  If anyone wants to donate to this wonderful trip that I am going on, it would be very much appreciated (you have no idea!) I suppose finishing my paper would be a good idea.  Alrighty, more to come on India, you can count on that!  Have great night! 

Day 1 comes to a close….This is tougher than I remember

Ok so I decided for a few different reasons that I will be fasting for the next 4 days.  I am doing a slightly modified fast so as not to wear myself out completely since a couple months ago, losing 12lbs b/c of illness.  2 small pieces of fruit and 2 small smoothies are allowed.  But mostly just water, green tea, sometimes juice if need be.  Yeah i’ve done a fast before but it was soo long ago, I forgot how tough this is.  Pray for me….

Green in the face….

Ok so last week didn’t really end the way I would have liked.  Things have been alittle tense here in L.A. 244 (my apt.)  With school, life, late nights of studying or just not sleeping, and being in a place where 5 women who never met each before the beginning of this semester….yeah you can bet some misunderstanding are bound to occur and moodiness and all the things that comes from being a woman, oh and there is only one exteremly small bathroom- yeah I don’t really need alot, I’m a low-fuss kind of girl, pretty easy to get along with, I don’t need a huge room or big bathroom and even though there are five girls, I’ve been dealin- but some people just don’t bend when it comes to things, sometime they make things miserable for others- why? I know thats just how some people are but until the day I die, i don’t think I will ever truly understand some people’s complete disregard for people and don’t care about anyone but themselves.  Anyways misunderstandings are misunderstandings.  And they are better when they are cleared up and resolved, but that process can be emotional to say the least.  AHH!  It’s also hard not knowing who you can and can’t vent to about things that frustrate you, and when you’ve lost the person that you are used to venting to- you can sometimes accidentally vent to a wrong person, even though you didn’t really mean/want to in the first place.  By friday, I was practically running out of my apartment to get home for the weekend, I just needed to get away.  I was looking forward to a wonderful, happy tutoring session with the autistic boy I tutor named Steven.  I hadn’t seen him in two weeks because they were on vacation so I really had been missing him and after the stressful week, that would be just the thing to lift my spirits.  Little did I know, i would be in for a big surprise.  His parents have decided that moving to Oregon would be the best thing for the family and for steven and his disabilities.  I did not take this very well, I cried pretty hard about this.  It is so easy to get attached to the child you are working with.  He is such an amazing kid and I have learned so much from him and I love him and his family so much.  I have been praying for them and hoping that they would come to know Jesus and now they are moving, I can only hope and pray that it will happen up in Oregon then.  I then saw some old family friends and went out to dinner with them, and it was just very sad to see what their lives are like now.  I love them so much but they have completely lost sight of how important God is in their lives. Sunday rolled around and Pastor Matt kicked our butts in service and did an AWESOME job at putting it out there on tithing- thanks Matt!  God really spoke to me about my tithing habits and the importance of sharing with God, giving Him what is rightfully His to begin with.  Very difficult subject but an important one.  Thank you Jesus for giving me just what I needed.  Monday came, all to quickly it did, and the stress started to roll in- I have a Lab Practicum tomorrow!  Tuesday I had 2 classes cancelled which was wonderful b/c I was able to sit in my apartment all alone- glorious! and study for 4 hrs straight on ALL the bones (parts, bumps, etc.) and muscles of the body….it’s alot to say the least.  Lab practicum time came- took that baby, think I did pretty good, dissected a sheep’s brain- yummy, wrote a 6 page research paper on Ruth and then called it a day at 1 am.  Today, I woke up with a migraine, a very bad sore throat, my ears hurt, and my glands are very swollen…I hope I’m not getting strep throat.  Today was a great day despite the feeling of sickness.  I had my small group potluck and that is always an immense blessing in my life.  I love my group so much.  Then i came home, went for a run and then came back and all the roommies were in the apartment, a rare occurence with one of the roommies.  it was then brittany’s idea for all of us to try this mint mask on our faces.   so the 5 of us, completely green-faced, gathered on the couch and took pictures of us as a apartment.  It was a nice thing that we were able to have that after such a bad week last week.  Now I am ready to go to bed b/c I am so exahusted.  Even though my week sounds like it hasn’t been that great, I know the Lord is blessing me and I have so many things to be thankful for- this is mostly a vent session for me, so I’m not really trying to complain about everything- just vent.  I know the Lord is making me stronger and testing me so that I can be a good example to my roommies and others around me.  I  am pressing on until monday afternoon when school lets out for Thanksgiving break- much needed- and I get to drive up and pick up my sis from SB, I miss her and haven’t seen her in months.  I need this break very much so.  Ok so I must depart but most importantly I wanted to announce that I applied and was picked to go on the Sandals Worldwide trip to India in April!!!  I am so unbelievably excited and I can’t wait to see what God is going to do in my life and the lives of my team (as well as the Botswana team) as we start to prepare for this trip.  I know God is going to do some amazing things in India and I am so excited that He wants to use me for His work! I feel so lucky to have this opportunity ….Ok more on India trip later.   Woo hoo!  Night!    

Pure Evil in a giant tin can

Ok so my mom thought it would be so sweet of her to drop off a present to me at my apartment, ya know alittle encouragment since school is so stressful right, yeah i like presents and it’s so thoughtful of her.   What does she bring me but one of those big tins with the three different flavored popcorns….and they are all so good!!! It’s just not right, it’s evil i tell you, you just can’t stop eating it.  course she isn’t gonna bring me something gross that I will hate but still.  I’ll have to get rid of some of it somehow b/c it’s just so good that I could eat it all myself. and that wouldn’t be the best idea.  For now,  I’m just gonna have to will myself to stay away from it for a little bit. 

I can’t believe this time has come!!

So as I put off writing an extremely boring paper on the setting of an American movie musical- btw, why did I take that class you might ask, well: 1. i needed an upper division english class credit 2. It sounds kinda cool and not too hard 3. It was what fit into my schedule. yeah but it’s not that cool, and I dont’ really want to analyze a musical, i just wanna watch it and enjoy it ok, why does it have to be so serious- it’s a musical for goodness sake.  Ok so back to my point, this past year or so has been so long and I have had the feeling that I would never be done with college and all this work and I feel like I’ve gotten nowhere, when will my hard work ever pay off? or maybe I’m doomed to be stuck writing ridiculous papers on musicals for years to come…. ok well i know that won’t really happen but it sure seems that way sometimes.  These past 3 1/2years have sure been quite a learning experience for me…has it been that long I ask- OH MY, yes it has been.  I feel like it’s been forever but oddly freshman year doesn’t seem so long ago- why is that, after all the classes, hrs of studying and hrs of pretending to study-ha!, jumping through this hoop and that hoop, that I have put in enough time and I am actually old enough to be called a college graduate (well soon to be) but it doesn’t seem like i have put in enough time and work to be here, it seems so soon- yes I said it- Today I turned in my graduation application.  I’ll still have to take classes in the summer to post degree and they have to approve my application but it should go through, and they better approve or else!  And I then I am going to do a 3-yr Master’s of Nursing program following graduation.  So, oh well if I am not technically done done with school, I’ll have a degree by next year and I am walking in my College Graduation ceremony in May- it is a BEAUTIFUL thing.  In the midst of all the stressfulness that this month has already been for me and more that is to come, I took a moment today and felt relieved, I can do this- if I can get through 3 years of school,  I can certainly get through less than 6 mo. more of school.  Thank the Lord He gives us the strength and determination that we need each and every day, I can say that without it, I would most certainly not be where I am today. YAY!